Sucks 2 Be You
by KNDfreak
Summary: As the title implies, random failures of me trying to pass or kill the witch. Some bigger then others xD. Most on Expert.
1. Flashlights

A/n: Um, yeah, just a fic about my random failures of owning the witch in l4d xD Some bigger then others, and some noobyish then others. Either way, I'm owned by the witch time after time again. XD Note to self: Never crown a witch XDDDD! Well, at least for me. And I'll tell you the real story at the end.

**Chapter 1: Flashlights are your enemies**

Zoey crept along in the dark with her comrades. There was a witch in the middle of the room, so they had to be quiet while sneaking around her. The problem with Zoey was A) She didn't like the dark, never liked the dark since she was little, and B) She was not a stealthy person. So while the others were being quiet, Zoey was panicing on the inside, afraid to startle the witch. She had her eyes on the sobbing witch since the team had seen her, never paying attention to her feet.

Louis, Bill, and Francis had already made it, now it was time for Zoey, who was failing at noticing her surroundings.

Just as she got to the exit, she stumbled towards the witch, her hand that was on the flashlight accidentally moving towards the 'on' button. The light of the flashlight caught the eyes of the witch, who started to growl and started to get up.

Panicing, Zoey shot at the witch, who let out a shrill scream and started to chase after zoey. Zoey would have screamed, but instead, she continue to shoot the witch, backing up into a wall she, again, fail to notice.

It happened so fast.

Zoey, who NOW found out that she ran into a wall, was slammed onto the ground by the witch. She looked up, eyes wide in surpise and fear, as the witch clawed her to her death. The others looked up before scrambling away, failing to notice a hunter following them.

* * *

**Real story: I wasn't paying attention, I was too busy getting a drink from my nightstand and accidentally press the 'K' button, AND I was in the direction of the witch and stuck between her and the wall. Auto Fail. I know. R&R.**


	2. Safe House

**Chapter 2: Don't go pass the witch!**

"TANK!"

That been the warning Zoey had heard. That was only thing she had heard. _Shit!_ She thought as she got ready to blow the huge hulk-like creature out of the waters. Soon, rumblings were heard and before long, the tank appeared, roaring in anger before throwing rocks at the team. The four had split, shooting at the tank.

The tank roared again, punching Bill far from the group, laying ground completely helpless.

"BILL!" Zoey yelled before returning shooting at the tank. The tank took its anger out at Louis, who was too slow to move out of the way, and was hit against the wall, causing him to black out. Next came Francis, who was already on the ground by the rock thrown at them. The tank kept hitting Francis until he was dead.

"Francis! NO!" Zoey screamed, looking at the tank with fear. The tank looked at her, eyes narrowing in anger before going after her. Zoey ran into the alley way, shooting at the tank once every so often. She kept running until she saw....._Safe house!_ She thought, smiling. She was going to win!

Suddenly a sob was heard, causing her to stop completely.

A witch.......

And she was right next to the safe house.....

_Goddamn it!_ She thought, face turning red. A loud roar broke her thoughts, reminding Zoey that she was running out of time. Zoey nodded to herself and ran stright into the witch. The witch must have sense her coming, because she was suddenly growling. Zoey shot at the witch, causing the witch to scream and run into her. Zoey had barely dodge the witch, but she was still on the ground, being killed by her. _No! I would have won if the damn witch wasn't there!_ She thought. Then the tank came and punched her, causing her to scream out in pain.

Zoey was dead.

* * *

**Real Story: The witch was by the safe house is all I'm saying. **


	3. Cr0wning Witches

**Chapter 3: Cr0wning the witch**

"You know how to cr0wn the witch, right?"

At the question, Zoey blinked slowly, turning her attention towards Francis.

"Do what to the witch?" She asked.

"You know, cr0wn the witch. What, did you really think I would have put myself in danger by startling her on purpose?" The group turned to each other before looking at Francis and nodded. Francis huffed before shaking his head. "The point is, cr0wning the witch is sorta a gold star. All you have to do is kill her with a clean headshot." He said. Zoey looked uncertain and was about to make a comment when a sob was heard.

A witch in the middle of the train tracks.

The group faced Zoey, as if she was knew exactly what to do. Zoey looked at Billy, then Louis, and then finally Francis.

"What?" Francis pointed at the witch.

"Go ahead. Kill her." He said in his rough voice. Zoey looked at him as if he'd lost his mind.

"Are you crazy?! I can't do that!" She loudly whispered, careful so she don't disturb the witch.

"Why the hell are you being such a baby? It's not like it's the first witch you'd seen and killed." Francis said, glaring. Zoey matched his glare before giving up and sighing. _They are trying to kill me!_ Zoey thought as she tiptoed towards the witch. Meanwhile, Louis and Bill were stalking towards the safe house, Francis watching in a amusement. When Zoey had shot the witch in the head, she was surprise that the witch didn't go down like she'd attented and was knocked down, being clawed to her death.

"OMG! Francis! HELP!" But Francis was too busy laughing to help, or head a certain hunter noise before he was force down and, like the witch, being clawed to his death. Back with Zoey, tears rolled down her face as the witch kept killing her. At the last second, Zoey screamed

"DAMN YOU FRANCIS!" Meanwhile, Bill and Louis were in the safe house, blinking when they realize that their temmates where not with them.

They didn't even realize that the two were dead.

* * *

**Real Story:** My friend to whom I was playing with (taking turns when one of us dies) kept telling me to kill the witch. At the time, I was a newbie at the game and I had realize that you should avoid the witch. So, my friend kept telling me that there were achivements for killing the witch and so I did. The problem was, I didn't know HOW to and at the end....yeah. R&R please.


	4. The AI Director Hates Me

**Chapter 4: Boomers + Witches = DOOM!**

"Come on, the sooner we get out of the cornfield and getting to the dock, the better chances of survivual." Bill grunted, as his last smoke (?) went out. The group groaned slightly, but didn't speak. The trail was quiet, a few noises were heard, but they seem too far to be worried about. Soon, it started to rain slightly and that's when the trouble began.

As soon as the rain started, the noises that they heard grew closer and random zombie-fied people came popping out of the thick forest of corn. Zoey, out of all of them, was tired, but kept fighting anyway. On this day, Zoey had seem to be the main target, seeing how she was the one taking the most damage. _It's like they are trying to kill the weakest link first._ She thought, chuckling slightly, before realizing something. _Did I just insulted myself?_ Soon, a boomer noise was heard and Zoey got on guard mode.

"BOOMER!" Louis shouted, but he seem to be in a distance. In fact, as Zoey looked around, she realized that when she was dreaming, none of the survivors were waiting for her.

"W-wait for me!" She called out before breaking into a sprint. Zoey kept her eyes on the road, shooting all the zombies that were in her way. Then, out of nowhere, the boomer she'd heard appeared and spit vomit at her before she could react.

"Ack!" Zoey said, and shot the boomer. Soon, hordes of zombies came after her, forcing Zoey to make a turn in the fields. However, in the fields, was a witch, and with Zoey being blind, shooting random things, she didn't realize she was close to her then she thought.

As soon as the bullet that, to the witch, came out of nowhere, landed inside of her pale skin, she screamed and chased after the shooter. Zoey eyes went wide when she was face to face with an angry witch and knocked down.

"Ah! No! Not again!" Zoey was dead.

* * *

**Real story: I honestly think the AI Director hated me in Blood Harvest. After being smokered TWICE, a hunter downing me, you would think my beatings would end right? Wrong. It wasn't long until I split up with the group and the boomer got me. IDK about some people, but I have a hard time seeing zombies in front of me when I'm boomered, and if there's a witch somewhere, then I'm good as dead. Yeah, the AI director hates me.**


End file.
